It’s the last day of the year 2025. I don’t know what kind of person you are at the end of the year…maybe you make resolutions, recluse in quiet to reflect on the past twelve months, or maybe you have no clue what the date is because that week after Christmas is kind of like a blur. I think I can be a mix of all three. Still, it tends to be one of my favorite weeks out of the entire year. I am a “remembering” gal, so I spend a lot of time in my head looking back in an almost daydreamy way. I tend to end every year in quiet with the Lord, reading back through my prayer journals and soaking in all that’s happened. The good, the hard, the growth, and the joy. I tend to write out a list for the new year that I boldly title Vision at the top, and I try to condense it all down into one nice word for the year. One year it was growth, another year it was nourish, and this past year it was fresh. I love words, visions, and goals, but today, it’s different. As I sit in the quiet morning hours sipping coffee and writing this post, I’m smiling, because this is the first year that I’m finally letting go of the pen.
Oh, I can be a dreamer, can you? I tend to be a first-class idea maker-upper with never-ending visions and plans that are constantly rotating around in my head. It can be a lot of fun, but it can also wear you out… and I do mean “you.” Poor Michael has firsthand experience in what it’s like to be on the receiving end of Brentlee’s constant ideas. It can be exhilarating (for me), but I’ve learned that the endless scheming and dreaming can also lead us to run a pace that we aren’t meant for. Which is why I’m not ending this year the same way I always have.
In the Spring of this year, I wrapped up a two-year discipleship program that I had the absolute privilege to be a part of. It was one of the most transforming experiences of my life, and I don’t say that lightly. It was hard, and it was beautiful. God met me with so much grace, and I’ll forever be changed. And one of those changes? I walked out of that season into one of the unknown. No plans, no ideas, no vision for what was next. I walked out with my hand holding His, instead of pulling on the leash and running ahead like my dog Andy does when I take him for a walk, and trust me- that’s an accurate description of how I lived beforehand. I had no idea where we were going, and yet I felt so peaceful. I have found that there’s such a deep rest in not taking charge and running ahead to follow all my ideas or dreams, but to instead do what we’re called to do: live day by day with Him. The fruit I’ve seen in this past year by letting God open doors and lead where He wants to take me has blown me away, and it looks nothing like what I had planned…and yet it’s so much better. So, after thirty years, I’ve finally handed over the pen that I’ve held such a grasp on for all my life. I’m no longer trying to write my own story how I think it ought to be written. I’m living day by day, page by page, in full surrender to the only one who has the authority and ownership over my life and my story. I guess it’s a good thing I enjoy a good adventure story, because I’m not sure where this one will lead, but I know this: it will be good, because it’s from the only one who is Good.
My prayer for you is that you would not only surrender your heart to Jesus, but that you would also learn to surrender your story. To trust that when you commit your way to Him, that He will act (Psalms 37:5). He’s a good Father, and He wrote the days of your life in His book long before you were born (Psalm 139:16). He has a story waiting for your life, and I pray you hand over the pen.
May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you. May the Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you peace.
Happy New Year, friend.
